Ficlet: I want to text you up (Glee, Rachel/Quinn)

[thegirl20]

TITLE: I want to text you up
FANDOM: Glee
PAIRING: Rachel/Quinn
SUMMARY: Quinn and Rachel discuss 'sexting'. Via text.
RATING: R
WORD COUNT: ~500
DISCLAIMER: Don't own 'em. They're Ryan Murphy's.
SPOILERS: Possibly 'Hairography'. But nothing overt.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This just popped into my head earlier and wouldn't leave. (I think it's because in another fic I'm writing I'm having to write sad!Rachel and that just breaks my heart.)

- Hey, what are you doing?

- I’m about to film my myspace video for the night. Why?

- So you’re alone?

- Yes.

- Santana was telling me about sexting today.

- Sexy texting. What about it?

- Wait. How do you know what it is? I didn’t.

- Quinn, I’m not Laura Ingalls Wilder.

- You just dress like her.

- That was a bit predictable for you.

- It’s the shock of you knowing about sexting.

- Noah and I tried it. I thought it was fun.

- You sexted with PUCK?!!?!

- Yes. But he objected to me correcting his spelling and grammar. So we stopped.

- I’m not sure how I feel about that.

- Don’t be jealous.

- I’m not jealous.

- I think you’re a little bit jealous.

- Well I’m not.

- Would you be less jealous if I sexted with you?

- I don’t know.

- Would you like to try?

- Whatever.

- OK, tell me what you’re wearing.

- Rachel, I’m pregnant, I’m wearing sweats and granny panties.

- OK. I’m not wearing anything.

-

- Quinn? You’re supposed to text something back.

- Are you really naked?

- Yes.

- God.

- What do you want me to do to myself?

- I can’t text that.

- Why not?

- Because.

- What’s the point in sexting if you’re not going to do it properly?

- Fine. I want you to touch yourself.

- Where?

- You know where.

- Quinn, I feel like I’m doing all the work here. Write something sexy!

- This feels weird.

- My hand is on my breast, fingers teasing my nipple, it’s so hard.

- RACHEL! I can’t believe you wrote that. Erase it from your sent items.

- I knew this wasn’t going to work. It’s like that time we tried to have phone sex.

- That wasn’t my fault.

- It was your fault. You laughed all the way through.

- I can’t help it if sex words aren’t sexy when you say them out loud.

- Or text them, apparently.

- It’s the celibacy club. It’s turned me into a prude.

- I don’t think I’d call what we did last night ‘prudish’.

- It’s different in person.

- Fine. No sexting for us. (I’m pouting now.)

- I’ll make it up to you.

- How?

- I could come over...

- Why would you be coming over?

- So that we could...wait, are you just trying to get me sexting again?

- Trying and failing. Fine, come over. Quickly. Or I might just drop Noah a text.

- Don’t you dare. I’ll be there in ten minutes.

- I’ll be waiting. Naked. Ready. Willing.

- Rachel, you’re killing me.

- Wet.

- I hate you. I’m in the car. Stop texting or I’ll crash.

- You don’t need to read them.

- Especially if you stop sending them.

- Fine. Bye. I love you. Prude.

- I love you too. Harlot.

Comments

[kben.livejournal.com]

YES!

- RACHEL! I can’t believe you wrote that. Erase it from your sent items.
SO VERY QUINN.

I love this. And it's so perfect for them. Because, really, I believe this is how it would go. And the idea of Rachel correcting Puck's sexts is hilarious.

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

SO VERY QUINN - The word 'Nipple' make the Baby Jesus blush.

At first I had thought it would be Rachel who would be all prudish about sexting. Then that seemed all wrong.

[marshmallowhobo.livejournal.com]

Laughing. My. Fucking. Ass. Off.

It deserved to be written out full. I literally have read this 4 times in like 5 mins. Hilarious! I love, love, loved it seriously omg.

Amazing.

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

:) I'm glad it amused you!!!

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

There's far better stuff than this out there!!! Check out rachel_quinn

[grdnofevrythng.livejournal.com]

Well it was no "Textually Stimulating," but it was all right...

No, I'm kidding. This was amazing. It was hilarious. So very Rachel and Quinn. You're an amazing woman.

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

That does it! You're no longer in the band!

;) Kidding. It definitely is no Textually Stimulating. I'll leave the simmering hot stuff to you, bb.

[chepis.livejournal.com]

OMG, this was so good. i laughed through it all. The texts were so in character, I lol'ed when Rachel mentioned the phone sex, at least they tried.

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

I'm glad this amused you. And I have this picture in my head of Rachel being very keen to try lots of sex things and Quinn being horrified by most of them ;)

[faithinthepoor.livejournal.com]

I loved this so much

I adore that Quinn is too repressed to sext or do phone sex!!!!!!!! I couldn't love her more at this point.

So cute and funny - my fav bits -

- Quinn, I’m not Laura Ingalls Wilder.

- You just dress like her. - unlike Rachel i did'nt find this predictalbe, I found it hilarious

- - yay for Quinn's mind being blown due to Rachel being naked!!!!!!!


- RACHEL! I can’t believe you wrote that. Erase it from your sent items. - My Quinn is such a practical girl

- I hate you. I’m in the car. Stop texting or I’ll crash.

- You don’t need to read them. Rachel can be practical too!!!!!!

- Trying and failing. Fine, come over. Quickly. Or I might just drop Noah a text. - funny and also a horrible thought at the same time!

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

Poor, repressed Quinn may have been pulled from personal experience. (I find most sex words hilarious, or gross, when spoken or written.)

unlike Rachel i did'nt find this predictable, I found it hilarious - I think when you're Rachel, you're probably quite accustomed to Quinn's jibes and that one felt too easy when I was writing it so Rachel had to comment.

I'm glad you liked the practicalities of both girls ;)

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

I don't think there's much that Quinn couldn't make sexy. And I agree, much better out of the Cheerio outfit than in it.

Sue needs their hair up so that she can grab their ponytails and swing them around her head when she is in a particularly bad mood.

[theokline.livejournal.com]

That was so cute and funny!

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[shadowlongknife.livejournal.com]

BAHA, this was hysterical, and cute, and really funny, although hysterical probably covered that.

I am overcaffienated, so I don't make much sense unless I'm being someone who is not me right now. Also, hi, Twitter friend.

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

Hi back, Twitter friend :)

This was just something silly that wouldn't leave my head. I also liked doing it because it meant I didn't have to put any pesky prose around the dialogue. (Which is why I like #Glitter.) I am lazy, you see :)

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

If you think of one, let me know ;)

Glad you liked it.

[slip-intoyou.livejournal.com]

hahaha I just read this three times lol. Where has this fic been?! Loved it!

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

:D I forgot about this one. Glad you liked it!!