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thegirl20TITLE: Born to hand jive, baby
FANDOM: Girls Aloud RPS
RATING: R
DISCLAIMER: I am in no way implying that this is a true representation of the 'real-people' in the story. I mean no disrespect.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Very short, very silly piece of nonsense, because I told![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
faithtastic that I'd write about Nadine's fahngarz. (But which actually turned out to be more about Sarah being a raging alcoholic) And anyway, she already wrote porny fic about Nadine's hands herself way better than I ever could!
Sarah stumbles a bit on her way back to the table, only just managing to keep the tray of drinks she's carrying upright with minimum spillage. They're in the VVIP room at the Brits after-party, wall-to-wall A-listers and champagne flowing like a bloody river. However, the table service is a bit slow for her liking. She'd followed Nadine to the toilet but got distracted by the bar on the way. She finally makes it back to their booth, plants the tray on the table and beams at the other girls.
"Awright, ladies! Shots all round!" she shouts, holding up two glasses and downing them both in quick succession.
Kimberley pulls Sarah down beside her and gives her a warning look, to which Sarah pays no heed whatsoever. She leans forward, throwing an arm over Kim's shoulders and beckoning Nicola and Cheryl to lean in from the opposite side of the table.
"One of The Saturdays just tried to snog me!" she tries to whisper but ends up shouting.
"Which one?" Nicola asks, as gleefully as it is possible for Nicola to ever be.
Sarah's face scrunches up in thought and she runs her hand through her hair.
"I wanna say...Freddie?"
Cheryl rolls her eyes.
"There isn't one called Freddie, babes."
"Well I don't know their bloody names, do I? They all kind of blend into one," Sarah protests. She glances at the two untouched shots in front of Kimberley. "You gonna drink those?"
Kim lifts the glasses and places them out of Sarah's reach.
"No, and neither are you. And how can you not know their names, Sarah? We toured with them for bloody months!" she admonishes.
Sarah bumps Kimberley's shoulder affectionately.
"Oh Kimba, some of us don't give a toss what the warm-up act's names are."
"Support act," Kimberley corrects.
"D'you mean, 'Frankie', pet?" Cheryl askes, hiding a smirk at Sarah and Kimberley's exchange. Kimberley's been like a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs all night, ever since Sarah proceeded to get monumentally plastered directly after their performance.
"Is she the one with the boy hair-cut?" Sarah asks.
"Listen to who's talking?" Kimberley mutters, playing with the short hairs at the nape of Sarah's neck.
"Well it was her then," Sarah affirms, leaning past Kimberley and swiping one of the shot glasses before she can be stopped.
"Where's Nadine?" Kimberley enquires, after yanking the glass out of Sarah's hand and downing it herself.
"Is she snogging one of the Saturdays too?" Nicola asks, then sniggers. Because when Nicola's drunk she finds everything about a hundred and ten percent funnier than when she's sober.
"Nah, she's at the loo," Sarah says. Her eyes go wide as she remembers something. "Fuck! I forgot to go to the toilet, I'm dying for a piss!"
"I'm goin' in a minute, you can come with me," Nicola offers and Kimberley tries not to sigh, because Sarah and Nicola should not be allowed to be drunk together in public.
"So, did you snog her back?" Cheryl asks.
Sarah shrugs.
"A bit. Was a nice change of pace from having Kimba's tongue down my throat, eh Kimba?" she says, nudging Kimberley quite painfully.
"Jesus, you get pissed and snog your mates a couple of times and they never let you live it down! I haven't done that in ages, Sarah," Kimberley says, wearily.
"True," Sarah says. She gets a glint in her eye and leans in conspiratorily again. "So, if you were gonna do a girl, properly like, who would it be?"
"I wouldn't," Nicola says, shaking her head firmly, an expression of mild disgust crossing her face.
Sarah rolls her eyes.
"OK, so everyone who isn't Ms Prude in the corner here, who would you do?"
"Who would you do?" Cheryl asks, turning Sarah's question back on her, her voice carrying a defensive edge.
"Nadine," Sarah says, without having to think about it.
"Eh?" Nicola says, suddenly interested in the conversation again.
"Nadine?" Kimberley asks. "Out of every girl in the world, you'd pick Nadine? Why?"
Cheryl remains silent but her cheeks are flushed and she's picking at the label on an empty bottle.
"Uh, hello? Two words. Well. Endowed." Sarah says, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. Then she holds her hand up and wiggles her fingers.
"Ew!" Nicola says.
"Ah!" Kimberley says, nodding.
Cheryl says nothing.
"I don't suppose it's exactly the same principle though, is it?" Kimberley continues. "I mean...she could do some damage with those things." She shifts uncomfortably in her seat at the thought.
"What do you think, Chezza?" Sarah prompts her unusually quiet bandmate. "Too long?"
Cheryl looks up quickly.
"What you askin' me for? How should I know? It's not like I'm a bloody expert on Nadine's fingers!"
Her unexpected outburst silences the other three and they stare at her in confusion. Then Kimberley's hand flies to cover her mouth.
"Oh my God!"
Cheryl meets her eyes and shakes her head slightly.
"What?" Sarah and Nicola say in unison.
"You...you haven't..." Kimberley asks.
"Haven't what?" Nicola asks even as Sarah starts to grin.
Cheryl takes a long drink from her glass to buy some time, but before she can confirm or deny any of their thoughts, Nadine appears at the end of the booth.
"Feckin' VVIP room my arse. The bloody hand-dryers in the toilet are all broken, can you believe it?" she rants, indignantly. She holds up both hands. "My fingers are soakin' wet, so they are!"
Cheryl's drink comes out of her nose.
FANDOM: Girls Aloud RPS
RATING: R
DISCLAIMER: I am in no way implying that this is a true representation of the 'real-people' in the story. I mean no disrespect.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Very short, very silly piece of nonsense, because I told
faithtastic that I'd write about Nadine's fahngarz. (But which actually turned out to be more about Sarah being a raging alcoholic) And anyway, she already wrote porny fic about Nadine's hands herself way better than I ever could!Sarah stumbles a bit on her way back to the table, only just managing to keep the tray of drinks she's carrying upright with minimum spillage. They're in the VVIP room at the Brits after-party, wall-to-wall A-listers and champagne flowing like a bloody river. However, the table service is a bit slow for her liking. She'd followed Nadine to the toilet but got distracted by the bar on the way. She finally makes it back to their booth, plants the tray on the table and beams at the other girls.
"Awright, ladies! Shots all round!" she shouts, holding up two glasses and downing them both in quick succession.
Kimberley pulls Sarah down beside her and gives her a warning look, to which Sarah pays no heed whatsoever. She leans forward, throwing an arm over Kim's shoulders and beckoning Nicola and Cheryl to lean in from the opposite side of the table.
"One of The Saturdays just tried to snog me!" she tries to whisper but ends up shouting.
"Which one?" Nicola asks, as gleefully as it is possible for Nicola to ever be.
Sarah's face scrunches up in thought and she runs her hand through her hair.
"I wanna say...Freddie?"
Cheryl rolls her eyes.
"There isn't one called Freddie, babes."
"Well I don't know their bloody names, do I? They all kind of blend into one," Sarah protests. She glances at the two untouched shots in front of Kimberley. "You gonna drink those?"
Kim lifts the glasses and places them out of Sarah's reach.
"No, and neither are you. And how can you not know their names, Sarah? We toured with them for bloody months!" she admonishes.
Sarah bumps Kimberley's shoulder affectionately.
"Oh Kimba, some of us don't give a toss what the warm-up act's names are."
"Support act," Kimberley corrects.
"D'you mean, 'Frankie', pet?" Cheryl askes, hiding a smirk at Sarah and Kimberley's exchange. Kimberley's been like a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs all night, ever since Sarah proceeded to get monumentally plastered directly after their performance.
"Is she the one with the boy hair-cut?" Sarah asks.
"Listen to who's talking?" Kimberley mutters, playing with the short hairs at the nape of Sarah's neck.
"Well it was her then," Sarah affirms, leaning past Kimberley and swiping one of the shot glasses before she can be stopped.
"Where's Nadine?" Kimberley enquires, after yanking the glass out of Sarah's hand and downing it herself.
"Is she snogging one of the Saturdays too?" Nicola asks, then sniggers. Because when Nicola's drunk she finds everything about a hundred and ten percent funnier than when she's sober.
"Nah, she's at the loo," Sarah says. Her eyes go wide as she remembers something. "Fuck! I forgot to go to the toilet, I'm dying for a piss!"
"I'm goin' in a minute, you can come with me," Nicola offers and Kimberley tries not to sigh, because Sarah and Nicola should not be allowed to be drunk together in public.
"So, did you snog her back?" Cheryl asks.
Sarah shrugs.
"A bit. Was a nice change of pace from having Kimba's tongue down my throat, eh Kimba?" she says, nudging Kimberley quite painfully.
"Jesus, you get pissed and snog your mates a couple of times and they never let you live it down! I haven't done that in ages, Sarah," Kimberley says, wearily.
"True," Sarah says. She gets a glint in her eye and leans in conspiratorily again. "So, if you were gonna do a girl, properly like, who would it be?"
"I wouldn't," Nicola says, shaking her head firmly, an expression of mild disgust crossing her face.
Sarah rolls her eyes.
"OK, so everyone who isn't Ms Prude in the corner here, who would you do?"
"Who would you do?" Cheryl asks, turning Sarah's question back on her, her voice carrying a defensive edge.
"Nadine," Sarah says, without having to think about it.
"Eh?" Nicola says, suddenly interested in the conversation again.
"Nadine?" Kimberley asks. "Out of every girl in the world, you'd pick Nadine? Why?"
Cheryl remains silent but her cheeks are flushed and she's picking at the label on an empty bottle.
"Uh, hello? Two words. Well. Endowed." Sarah says, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. Then she holds her hand up and wiggles her fingers.
"Ew!" Nicola says.
"Ah!" Kimberley says, nodding.
Cheryl says nothing.
"I don't suppose it's exactly the same principle though, is it?" Kimberley continues. "I mean...she could do some damage with those things." She shifts uncomfortably in her seat at the thought.
"What do you think, Chezza?" Sarah prompts her unusually quiet bandmate. "Too long?"
Cheryl looks up quickly.
"What you askin' me for? How should I know? It's not like I'm a bloody expert on Nadine's fingers!"
Her unexpected outburst silences the other three and they stare at her in confusion. Then Kimberley's hand flies to cover her mouth.
"Oh my God!"
Cheryl meets her eyes and shakes her head slightly.
"What?" Sarah and Nicola say in unison.
"You...you haven't..." Kimberley asks.
"Haven't what?" Nicola asks even as Sarah starts to grin.
Cheryl takes a long drink from her glass to buy some time, but before she can confirm or deny any of their thoughts, Nadine appears at the end of the booth.
"Feckin' VVIP room my arse. The bloody hand-dryers in the toilet are all broken, can you believe it?" she rants, indignantly. She holds up both hands. "My fingers are soakin' wet, so they are!"
Cheryl's drink comes out of her nose.
