Ficlet: Different (Firefly, Kaylee)

[thegirl20]

Written for the first round at big_damn_quests where my character is Kaylee.

Title: Different
Author: Angie
Character: Kaylee
Rating: PG-13
Prompt: Describe your greatest fear, and how it has changed your life.
Word Count: 271


Never spent much time thinkin’ on bein’ scared. I liked to think that most folks are decent types who’d help you out ‘fore they’d try to hurt you.

An’ since I’d been on Serenity, I had no need to be scared, ‘cause we all looked out for each other. Even when I got shot up, I wasn’t ever scared, not really. ‘Cause the captain was there, makin’ sure I was gunna get fixed up and I could hear ‘Nara talkin’ to me, tellin’ me it was OK. And I knew they wouldn’t let anythin’ happen to me.

Then I met Jubal Early. He was big and mean and he could hurt me. Wasn’t nobody else there, just me and him. Knowin’ that there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to stop him from hurtin’ me if he took a mind to was the scaredest I ever felt. Serenity had always felt like home, little and warm. When I was there with him, it felt like the biggest place in the ‘verse. A big echoin’ cave where nobody could hear me or get to me.

His eyes made me cold. It was like lookin’ out into the black. Nothin’ there, nothin’ to appeal to or reason with. Blank.

Since that night, I walk a little closer to the Captain than I did. I hold onto Inara’s arm when we’re in a township. I find myself lookin’ at people different. A part of my mind wonders if maybe they’d hurt me, given a chance. An’ I don’t like feelin’ that way. I don’t like how he’s made me afraid. But he did.

Comments

[faithinthepoor.livejournal.com]

You already know how disturbed I was by that particular moment in the engine room. For all your worry about what to write for Kaylee, this is really good. I particularly love that the biggest crime that Early committed wasn't his actual actions (heinous as they were) but rather that he took Serenity - her home and her love - and made the ship frightening and alien. I also love the effect that it has had on her - so often people don't let these major moments change characters - but she will never be the same. (Still when they let these moments break my characters - Carter in ER, Lindsay in The Practice, even though I applaud the reality, it is completely heart breaking for me!)

[the-girl-20.livejournal.com]

For all your worry about what to write for Kaylee, this is really good. - Thanks, glad you think so. I'm still not overly thrilled with it, but it will do. Hopefully the next challenge won't cause me so much stress!