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Alphabetsoup: Idina/Kristin
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femslash100's alphabetsoup. - COMPLETE!
A is for anticipate
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
You wait your whole life to meet that ‘special’ person. And you know when you do it’s all going to make sense at last.
Then she comes bursting into your life. And it’s as wonderful as you knew it would be. She makes you laugh, she brings you daisies, she smiles her beautiful smile and lights up your world. When you’re in her arms you know that’s where you are meant to be. You fit.
You never really considered that the love of your life might be married by the time you met her. That wasn’t part of the plan.
B is for bamboozle
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
I don’t get it. Really I don’t. I mean, yes I can see that Idina is sort of attractive, if you like that kinda ‘I pretend to be shy but you know deep down I’m a slut’ thing. And yes, there’s the voice. But her and Kristin? I did not see that coming. Maybe it’s because I spend all my time in that damn chair – things happen a level above me. Obviously I’m missing something. And I do not enjoy being out of the loop. It’s just baffling.
I mean, why would Kristin want Idina, when she could have me?
C is for collapse
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
You are what people would call a cynic. You’re always looking for the worst. Waiting for the other shoe to fall. Your therapist thinks it has to do with your parents’ divorce. He talks about your ‘walls’. Shrinks. Hmph.
But you know that you opened up once and let yourself think that maybe you’d found this mystical ‘happiness’ that people talk about. You found yourself writing love notes, stealing kisses and waking up smiling. The walls were tumbling down.
Funny how four little words can change things.
“I’m leaving the show.”
Your parents started the walls. She added the cement.
D is for dank
Rating: R
Word count: 250
“This is the weirdest thing you’ve ever made me do, Michelle, and that’s saying something.”
“Shut up!” Michelle hissed, gripping Eden’s wrist and squeezing, hard.
Eden managed not to scream in pain and dutifully followed Michelle in silence through the dark, musty smelling basement of the Gershwin. After a minute, Michelle brought them both to a halt. All of a sudden, the place was illuminated by a flashlight Michelle had acquired from somewhere.
”Gotcha!”
Eden’s eyes took a moment to adjust to the light, but when they did she had to squeeze them closed to hide the fact that a very naked Idina and Kristin were scrambling to get off an old chaise-longue.
“How many fucking times are you going to do that, Federer?” Idina’s angry voice rang out in the cavernous space.
Eden’s eyes flew open.
“You’ve done this before?” she asked, incredulously.
“As many times as it takes for you two dumbasses to find someplace else to have sex.” Michelle responded, paying no heed to Eden.
Kristin had managed to get herself mostly dressed so Eden focussed on her as she spoke.
“I am so sorry, I had absolutely no idea about this…she just said she had something to show me.”
“That’s alright, darling. Michelle, please stop aiming that thing at Idina’s butt. Now!”
Eden grabbed the flashlight from Michelle and turned it off.
“C’mon, we’re leaving.” She turned in the vague direction of Idina and Kristin. “We’re really sorry to have interrupted your…sex…so…we’ll leave you to…yeah…whatever. Bye!”
E is for elliptical
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
He knows she’ll come back. This happens every so often. Like a cycle, she’ll see someone she likes and go off to have some fun with them. But she always comes full circle. He draws a circle on her belly with his finger. She shivers in her sleep.
This time it’s taken longer. The circle has been squeezed, so that the sides have lengthened and it seems like it’s harder for her to get around that last bend into the home straight. But he knows she’ll make it. He traces an oval on her thigh. She turns away from him.
F is for fatal
Rating: R
Word count: 100
He watches his wife run her hands down another woman’s body with cold detachment. It seems there’s a certain inevitability about this. They met under similar circumstances. It had been a turn on.
Hadn’t been quite so arousing to find her straddling her little, blonde co-star in her dressing room. She had begged and pleaded. Promised him it meant nothing. He had believed her.
Now, as he watches her squeeze Tracie’s ass, he’s sure they’re hurtling along the same track to the same destination. There will always be that niggling doubt. And that’s what will be the end of them.
G is for girdle
Rating: R
Word count: 250
“So? What did you guys think?” Charlotte asked as they filed out onto the street.
“I thought it was wonderful, sweetie.” Carrie muttered, checking her cell.
“You didn’t tell me they were fucking each other!” Samantha interjected.
“Who?” Charlotte asked, confused.
“The two witches?” Miranda asked, nodding at Samantha. “Oh, completely! I mean, that song at the end? Much more romantic than the one with the guy, which was basically ‘Well, we’re both here, we might as well have sex’. The witches were so doing it.”
“They were not!” Charlotte protested. “Elphaba loved Fiyero and they’re going to be happy together.”
“He’s a fucking scarecrow, Charlotte, how happy would you be if you woke up to find someone trying to shove straw into your va…”
“Please! Don’t finish that!” Charlotte begged, holding her hand up.
“Anyway, I wasn’t talking about the characters, I was talking about the actresses fucking each other.” Samantha clarified.
“Nobody is fucking! Why must everyone be fucking? Why can’t we just have a nice night at the theatre without people fucking?” Charlotte ranted.
Samantha draped an arm around Charlotte’s shoulders.
“Honey, I used to be a lesbian so- ”
“I don’t think a week counts as lesbianism, Samantha.” Miranda interrupted.
“-so I know about these things. And that tall one was all over the little one. She could barely keep her eyes off her tits! Although, in that corset, I almost had a relapse myself.”
Charlotte sighed.
“I’m never bringing you to the theatre again. Ever.”
H is for hankering
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 200
The little dog flopped down on her bedding, oblivious to the concerned gaze of her mistress.
“I’m worried about her, Idina. She’s not eating properly, she mopes around all day. What do you think we should do?”
Idina put her arm around Kristin’s shoulders and sighed.
“Well, I think there’s only one thing that we can do. We’ll obviously just need to return the baby.”
“Idina!”
Kristin glanced at the bassinette to check that the newborn was asleep, afraid that she’d overheard. Idina was grinning.
“Well, if Maddie’s jealous of her, what other choice do we have?”
“Your humour fails to amuse. This is serious.”
Idina rolled her eyes and pulled Kristin against her chest, her hands skirting over the softness of her belly.
“Honey, she’s used to being an only child, she’ll adjust in no time. All she wants is a little bit of her momma’s attention. Buy her a chew toy and be sure to tickle her ears once or twice a day and she’ll be fine.”
“I know…she was like this when you moved in here.”
“And I won her over with my charm.”
“And the stash of treats you kept in your pocket.”
“Yeah, and those.”
I is for ink
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 250
The steady pounding in her head brought her to an unwelcome state of consciousness. She turned and snuggled against the warm body behind her. Immediately she knew something wasn’t right. She slowly opened one eye, only to find herself looking directly into the face of a sleeping Michelle Federer.
Kristin screamed.
A wide-eyed Idina popped up from behind the still slumbering Michelle.
”Wha…what is it?”
Kristin pointed at the body stretched out between them. Idina flopped back onto the pillows.
“S’okay, we didn’t do anything naughty.”
“What is she doing here?” Kristin hissed.
“She was too wasted to go home so she crashed here.”
“In our bed? What on earth was wrong with the spare room?”
No response. Kristin huffed and pulled herself out of bed, stomping to the bathroom. She looked at herself blearily in the mirror, her reflection slowly coming into focus.
She blinked.
“Idina Menzel, get your ass in here right now!”
She heard footsteps plodding on the wooden floor, Idina appeared in the doorway, rubbing her eyes. Kristin turned to face her, her mouth set in a stern line, foot tapping. Idina looked at her, and covered her mouth. The bridge of Kristin’s nose was covered in rather large black dots.
“Oh Kris…God…she must’ve…you kept going on about how cute mine were and when you fell asleep she must’ve…actually…I do remember something about a marker pen.”
Kristin turned back to the mirror.
“If this is permanent ink I’m going to kill both of you. A lot.”
J is for jugular
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 150
Kristin watched the steady pulse in the baby’s neck. The tiny infant slept on, unaware of her silent guardian angel.
“She’s not going to run away in the middle of the night.”
Idina’s whisper was right beside her ear and made her jump slightly. She turned around with a stern look at the ready but it melted away at the sight of Idina, still tousled from sleep. Kristin drew Idina’s arms around her waist and leaned back against her.
“I know she’s not. But I just…sometimes I need to make sure she’s real. That she’s really here.”
Idina dropped her chin to Kristin’s shoulder and pressed their cheeks together.
“I know, me too.”
Kristin turned slightly, surprised.
“You do?”
“Yep, you’re not the only neurotic one. I come in and listen to her breathe.”
Kristin turned back to the crib.
“She’s just so tiny and precious.”
“Just like her mommy.”
K is for knife
Rating: R
Word count: 250
“You tried to stab me!”
“Oh I did not, you are such a drama queen, Menzel.”
Kristin rolled her eyes at the voices coming from the kitchen. When left alone together, Michelle and Idina tended to regress to somewhere around the third grade.
“You fucking tried to stab me, you psycho bitch!”
“I can’t help it if you insist on standing behind me while I’m cutting bread. Trying to sneak a look down my top again, huh? Pervert.”
“Nah, last time I checked there was just a clear view to your feet.”
“Oh, and you’re so well endowed in that area.”
Kristin sighed and walked in to stop the argument before it escalated. Idina immediately pointed at Michelle.
“She just tried to stab me.”
Michelle raised an eyebrow.
“And why are you telling her? What’s she going to do about it?”
Idina ignored her and thrust her hand towards Kristin.
“Look, she drew blood and everything.”
Kristin took Idina’s hand and inspected it.
“I can’t see anything, honey.”
“Look!” Idina insisted, pointing at her thumb.
Kristin squinted. There did appear to be a miniscule cut. She looked up at Idina and stuck her bottom lip out in an exaggerated pout.
“Awwww, my poor baby, did you get a boo-boo?”
“If you offer to kiss it better for her, I swear to God I’ll use this knife to slit my wrists.”
Idina raised both eyebrows at Kristin.
“Well? What are you waiting for? That’s the best offer I’ve heard all year!”
L is for loner
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
I have this reputation as a quiet, shy person who doesn’t like the company of others. That’s not true. I’m just very picky about who I spend my time with.
I know people think that Kristin’s good for me. That she brings me out of my shell. Well, kinda. I just want to be wherever she is. If that means at a party with a hundred people, fine. If it means just the two of us in her dressing room, all the better.
Kristin is a people person, she loves noise and bustle. I’m a Kristin person, I love her.
M is for marvel
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
Idina finds her standing in front of the couch, looking at it like it’s the eighth wonder of the world.
“What’s up?”
Kristin turns in a stupor and points.
“That’s our couch.”
Idina nods slowly.
“No, but Idina, that’s our couch.”
Idina smiles in realisation. She puts her arm around Kristin’s shoulders.
“I know, baby.”
“Our couch. Not mine, or yours, ours.”
Idina laughs, pressing her nose into Kristin’s hair.
“OK, maybe you should stay out of the kitchen for a while. I’m kinda scared that seeing our dishwasher and our toaster and our stove might just blow your mind.”
N is for narcotic
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
She’s never been a good sleeper. Especially when sharing a bed. She always worried that she’d snore or drool. Or that he’d be able to feel the beginnings of stubble on legs that were a day overdue for shaving. Or that he’d wake up and regret that she was there.
Lately she hasn’t found sleep to be a problem. She wakes up with a delightfully warm weight on her chest, feeling rested and content. The deep sleep might be a result of the fact that the warm weight completely tired her out the night before. Beats counting sheep any day.
O is for opposite
Rating: R
Word count: 100
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.
When she’s kissing Taye, she can’t help but think of all the times she’s kissed his wife. She wonders if he can taste Idina on her.
As she slides her hands up Idina’s thighs and lowers her head she tries desperately not to think of Idina sinking to her knees in front of Taye, taking him into her mouth.
When Idina’s breath hitches, in that dreadful second, Kristin waits for the whispered name to cross her lips.
“Kristin.”
She stifles a sob, relieved. But she knows that this fucked-up triangle can’t last.
P is for paltry
Rating: R
Word count: 200
I thought I’d cracked their little code. Weeks of careful study, and a degree of covert stalking, has resulted in some concrete conclusions.
“You wanna run lines?” is code for making out. Because Idina always comes out with her lipstick smudged after ‘running lines’.
“You wanna block that scene?” is code for something more energetic. There’s a lot of banging and grunting going on during ‘blocking’.
“You wanna grab a bite after work?” means that Taye is away somewhere. Kristin always perks up considerably when going for a ‘bite after work’ with Idina.
I had thought that “You wanna come in for a cupcake?” was code for…well, eating of sorts was definitely involved. Then Kristin extended that very same invitation to me last week.
I got all excited, practically ran into her dressing room and was very disappointed to see a plateful of cupcakes.
So I can verify that “You wanna come in for a cupcake?” means…exactly that. I got a measly cupcake and I had to revisit my theory.
Maybe I’m reading a little too much into “You wanna get a coffee? My treat.” Hmmm, I might need to invite one of them for a coffee, just to check.
Q is for quilt
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
Idina thinks this must be her favourite place in the world. A New York winter shivers outside the window. She’s lying on the couch not watching the movie that’s playing. She’s sharing a warm quilt with a short blonde. In this moment life seems perfect.
But it’s not her couch. It’s not her quilt. It’s not her life. In a short while she’ll have to go back to her own apartment where she’ll crawl into bed with her husband. He’ll roll over and pull her to him, winding his strong arm around her waist. But it won’t feel like this.
R is for rind
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 150
She absentmindedly plays with the skin of the lime from her drink. Normally she stays away from spirits. Tonight vodka is her friend.
Vodka and soda with a slice of lime, not lemon. Idina’s drink. She smiles sardonically. The reason she is drinking at all is to forget about Idina. It isn’t quite working out that way.
She thinks back to the last time she saw her. The party after her last show. Idina had propped up the bar all night, watching her. Seemed like she drank herself sober. Kristin had danced and laughed and sparkled the whole night. But it was an act the green eyes following her every move could see right through.
At the end of the night, Idina had walked steadily to Kristin, kissed her on the cheek and left.
Now Kristin finds herself in drinking in LA. With nothing but Idina’s favourite drink for company.
S is for startle
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
I think I scared the life out of her the first time I kissed her. She was sitting in my dressing-room, fresh from the shower, complaining that Michelle had run over her foot in the wheelchair. There was a moment; her bottom lip was sticking out slightly, a series of lines crinkling the space between her dark eyebrows, and I couldn’t not kiss her. So I did. And she physically jumped off her seat. She looked at me with widened eyes before turning and walking out. But she soon came back. And the next time we kissed, she started it.
T is for trickle
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
She stares at the needle in her arm, feeling the drug spread slowly and delightfully through her body. She thinks she might be in love with her drip. She thinks she might be a little bit high.
She wonders how much of the stuff in her head is real. Is she really green? Did she really melt? Can she really fly?
She remembers falling, not flying. She doesn’t remember landing, only hurting. She couldn’t breathe. She thinks she asked for Kristin. Kristin wasn’t there.
Taye’s here, worried and strong, keeping watch.
Kristin should be here, flying with her. So high.
U is for undulating
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
The sky is unnervingly blue. Kristin sits on the sand and watches the waves roll onto the golden sand. It is warm and sunny in California, as always.
Kristin can’t help but think back to a winter’s day in New York. To two people huddled together on a bench in Battery Park under a sky heavy with threatened snow. Two sets of hands clasping a single cup of hot-chocolate. And later watching the snow fall, snuggled under a blanket in a warm apartment.
Kristin shivers from the metaphorical chill of her current surroundings. It is clinical perfection. It isn’t real.
V is for votive
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
When I was younger, I used to ask Him to take away the feelings I had that I knew were wrong. I hated them. I hated myself for having them. I thought He must be punishing me by forcing me to feel that way. I begged and pleaded. I’d be a good girl, I’d do anything, just take away these feelings. But He never did.
Then I met her, and suddenly it all changed. The feelings didn’t feel wrong anymore. They felt wonderful. And I like to think He knew that all along.
Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers.
W is for wanton
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
She knows she shouldn’t do it. But sometimes she needs to show it.
So she’ll sit in Idina’s lap during rehearsals, wrapped up in her arms for the world to see just how much she belongs there.
She’ll make sure that she leaves with Idina. Whether they are only walking to the sidewalk then going their separate ways or not, they will walk out that door together and people will know it.
She keeps Idina to herself more than she should, hidden away, just the two of them.
It’s dangerous. Someone could get hurt. But she needs to show it.
X is for Xmas
Rating: G
Word count: 100
They were seated in a tiny café in the Village. The windows were covered in condensation. Idina used her finger to write ‘Happy Xmas’ on a single pane. Kristin smiled.
“My momma always yelled at me if I wrote ‘Xmas’, she said it was ‘taking the Christ out of Christmas’.”
Idina tilted her head.
“As a kid I used to worry something would happen to me if I wrote ‘Christmas’. So I always wrote Xmas.”
She took Kristin’s hand.
“But now I do a lot of things that the Rabbi would frown upon. I write Xmas now cuz it’s shorter.”
Y is for yank
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 250
“I don’t get it.”
Kristin’s confused voice renewed the laughter among the other women at the reunion. Michelle had been telling a story which had something to do with Norbert and sex, as Michelle’s stories tended to be. The ending had caused much raucous laughter, but Kristin was lost. Idina put an arm around her shoulders and squeezed.
“It’s OK baby. You guys, she’s from the South, they’re a bit slow down there.”
Kristin pursed her lips and reached for her phone. She punched in a few numbers.
“What’re you doing? Calling Denny to have him explain it to you?” Idina asked, still giggling.
“No, I’m calling my momma to tell her what you just said.”
Idina’s smile froze.
“What? No, look, I’m sorry, I was kidding.”
“Oooooh, Big Bad Menzel is scared of Kristin’s mom!” Michelle noted, gleefully.
“No I’m not. She’s lovely. And she’s been incredibly accepting of the fact that I’m a Jewish divorcee who has corrupted her daughter…but I don’t think she’s ever gotten over me not being Southern.”
“Hey momma, it’s me. I’m fine. Yeah, she’s fine too, but you’ll never guess what she just said…well, I think I should let her tell you. I’ll put her on.”
Kristin handed the phone over with a smile. Idina took it like it might suddenly explode.
“Hello?”
“…the time at the third stroke will be ten…”
“You bitch!” Idina exclaimed, shoving Kristin’s shoulder.
“That’ll teach you to be polite. Damn Yank.”
Idina kissed her lightly.
“Yes ma’am.”
Z is for zipper
Rating: PG
Word count: 150
We met in a dressing room. She barged in, hair plastered to her head, make-up half removed, wearing an oversized child’s dress. I thought she was beautiful.
Anthony introduced us. She was obviously embarrassed by her appearance, she’d come in to get Anthony’s help with her zipper, it was stuck. We made the appropriate noises about each other’s work as he tried to work the zipper free. He did, eventually, and she left.
Later that night, she walked into the bar looking like a million dollars. She came straight up to me and held out her hand.
“Hi, I believe you met my evil twin earlier. She’s gone now. I’m Kristin.”
The moment our hands touched I knew I wanted her. By the end of the night, I knew I needed her. Didn’t take all that much longer to figure out that I loved her.
Now? Now I’ve got her.
femslash100's alphabetsoup. - COMPLETE! A is for anticipate
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
You wait your whole life to meet that ‘special’ person. And you know when you do it’s all going to make sense at last.
Then she comes bursting into your life. And it’s as wonderful as you knew it would be. She makes you laugh, she brings you daisies, she smiles her beautiful smile and lights up your world. When you’re in her arms you know that’s where you are meant to be. You fit.
You never really considered that the love of your life might be married by the time you met her. That wasn’t part of the plan.
B is for bamboozle
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
I don’t get it. Really I don’t. I mean, yes I can see that Idina is sort of attractive, if you like that kinda ‘I pretend to be shy but you know deep down I’m a slut’ thing. And yes, there’s the voice. But her and Kristin? I did not see that coming. Maybe it’s because I spend all my time in that damn chair – things happen a level above me. Obviously I’m missing something. And I do not enjoy being out of the loop. It’s just baffling.
I mean, why would Kristin want Idina, when she could have me?
C is for collapse
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
You are what people would call a cynic. You’re always looking for the worst. Waiting for the other shoe to fall. Your therapist thinks it has to do with your parents’ divorce. He talks about your ‘walls’. Shrinks. Hmph.
But you know that you opened up once and let yourself think that maybe you’d found this mystical ‘happiness’ that people talk about. You found yourself writing love notes, stealing kisses and waking up smiling. The walls were tumbling down.
Funny how four little words can change things.
“I’m leaving the show.”
Your parents started the walls. She added the cement.
D is for dank
Rating: R
Word count: 250
“This is the weirdest thing you’ve ever made me do, Michelle, and that’s saying something.”
“Shut up!” Michelle hissed, gripping Eden’s wrist and squeezing, hard.
Eden managed not to scream in pain and dutifully followed Michelle in silence through the dark, musty smelling basement of the Gershwin. After a minute, Michelle brought them both to a halt. All of a sudden, the place was illuminated by a flashlight Michelle had acquired from somewhere.
”Gotcha!”
Eden’s eyes took a moment to adjust to the light, but when they did she had to squeeze them closed to hide the fact that a very naked Idina and Kristin were scrambling to get off an old chaise-longue.
“How many fucking times are you going to do that, Federer?” Idina’s angry voice rang out in the cavernous space.
Eden’s eyes flew open.
“You’ve done this before?” she asked, incredulously.
“As many times as it takes for you two dumbasses to find someplace else to have sex.” Michelle responded, paying no heed to Eden.
Kristin had managed to get herself mostly dressed so Eden focussed on her as she spoke.
“I am so sorry, I had absolutely no idea about this…she just said she had something to show me.”
“That’s alright, darling. Michelle, please stop aiming that thing at Idina’s butt. Now!”
Eden grabbed the flashlight from Michelle and turned it off.
“C’mon, we’re leaving.” She turned in the vague direction of Idina and Kristin. “We’re really sorry to have interrupted your…sex…so…we’ll leave you to…yeah…whatever. Bye!”
E is for elliptical
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
He knows she’ll come back. This happens every so often. Like a cycle, she’ll see someone she likes and go off to have some fun with them. But she always comes full circle. He draws a circle on her belly with his finger. She shivers in her sleep.
This time it’s taken longer. The circle has been squeezed, so that the sides have lengthened and it seems like it’s harder for her to get around that last bend into the home straight. But he knows she’ll make it. He traces an oval on her thigh. She turns away from him.
F is for fatal
Rating: R
Word count: 100
He watches his wife run her hands down another woman’s body with cold detachment. It seems there’s a certain inevitability about this. They met under similar circumstances. It had been a turn on.
Hadn’t been quite so arousing to find her straddling her little, blonde co-star in her dressing room. She had begged and pleaded. Promised him it meant nothing. He had believed her.
Now, as he watches her squeeze Tracie’s ass, he’s sure they’re hurtling along the same track to the same destination. There will always be that niggling doubt. And that’s what will be the end of them.
G is for girdle
Rating: R
Word count: 250
“So? What did you guys think?” Charlotte asked as they filed out onto the street.
“I thought it was wonderful, sweetie.” Carrie muttered, checking her cell.
“You didn’t tell me they were fucking each other!” Samantha interjected.
“Who?” Charlotte asked, confused.
“The two witches?” Miranda asked, nodding at Samantha. “Oh, completely! I mean, that song at the end? Much more romantic than the one with the guy, which was basically ‘Well, we’re both here, we might as well have sex’. The witches were so doing it.”
“They were not!” Charlotte protested. “Elphaba loved Fiyero and they’re going to be happy together.”
“He’s a fucking scarecrow, Charlotte, how happy would you be if you woke up to find someone trying to shove straw into your va…”
“Please! Don’t finish that!” Charlotte begged, holding her hand up.
“Anyway, I wasn’t talking about the characters, I was talking about the actresses fucking each other.” Samantha clarified.
“Nobody is fucking! Why must everyone be fucking? Why can’t we just have a nice night at the theatre without people fucking?” Charlotte ranted.
Samantha draped an arm around Charlotte’s shoulders.
“Honey, I used to be a lesbian so- ”
“I don’t think a week counts as lesbianism, Samantha.” Miranda interrupted.
“-so I know about these things. And that tall one was all over the little one. She could barely keep her eyes off her tits! Although, in that corset, I almost had a relapse myself.”
Charlotte sighed.
“I’m never bringing you to the theatre again. Ever.”
H is for hankering
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 200
The little dog flopped down on her bedding, oblivious to the concerned gaze of her mistress.
“I’m worried about her, Idina. She’s not eating properly, she mopes around all day. What do you think we should do?”
Idina put her arm around Kristin’s shoulders and sighed.
“Well, I think there’s only one thing that we can do. We’ll obviously just need to return the baby.”
“Idina!”
Kristin glanced at the bassinette to check that the newborn was asleep, afraid that she’d overheard. Idina was grinning.
“Well, if Maddie’s jealous of her, what other choice do we have?”
“Your humour fails to amuse. This is serious.”
Idina rolled her eyes and pulled Kristin against her chest, her hands skirting over the softness of her belly.
“Honey, she’s used to being an only child, she’ll adjust in no time. All she wants is a little bit of her momma’s attention. Buy her a chew toy and be sure to tickle her ears once or twice a day and she’ll be fine.”
“I know…she was like this when you moved in here.”
“And I won her over with my charm.”
“And the stash of treats you kept in your pocket.”
“Yeah, and those.”
I is for ink
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 250
The steady pounding in her head brought her to an unwelcome state of consciousness. She turned and snuggled against the warm body behind her. Immediately she knew something wasn’t right. She slowly opened one eye, only to find herself looking directly into the face of a sleeping Michelle Federer.
Kristin screamed.
A wide-eyed Idina popped up from behind the still slumbering Michelle.
”Wha…what is it?”
Kristin pointed at the body stretched out between them. Idina flopped back onto the pillows.
“S’okay, we didn’t do anything naughty.”
“What is she doing here?” Kristin hissed.
“She was too wasted to go home so she crashed here.”
“In our bed? What on earth was wrong with the spare room?”
No response. Kristin huffed and pulled herself out of bed, stomping to the bathroom. She looked at herself blearily in the mirror, her reflection slowly coming into focus.
She blinked.
“Idina Menzel, get your ass in here right now!”
She heard footsteps plodding on the wooden floor, Idina appeared in the doorway, rubbing her eyes. Kristin turned to face her, her mouth set in a stern line, foot tapping. Idina looked at her, and covered her mouth. The bridge of Kristin’s nose was covered in rather large black dots.
“Oh Kris…God…she must’ve…you kept going on about how cute mine were and when you fell asleep she must’ve…actually…I do remember something about a marker pen.”
Kristin turned back to the mirror.
“If this is permanent ink I’m going to kill both of you. A lot.”
J is for jugular
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 150
Kristin watched the steady pulse in the baby’s neck. The tiny infant slept on, unaware of her silent guardian angel.
“She’s not going to run away in the middle of the night.”
Idina’s whisper was right beside her ear and made her jump slightly. She turned around with a stern look at the ready but it melted away at the sight of Idina, still tousled from sleep. Kristin drew Idina’s arms around her waist and leaned back against her.
“I know she’s not. But I just…sometimes I need to make sure she’s real. That she’s really here.”
Idina dropped her chin to Kristin’s shoulder and pressed their cheeks together.
“I know, me too.”
Kristin turned slightly, surprised.
“You do?”
“Yep, you’re not the only neurotic one. I come in and listen to her breathe.”
Kristin turned back to the crib.
“She’s just so tiny and precious.”
“Just like her mommy.”
K is for knife
Rating: R
Word count: 250
“You tried to stab me!”
“Oh I did not, you are such a drama queen, Menzel.”
Kristin rolled her eyes at the voices coming from the kitchen. When left alone together, Michelle and Idina tended to regress to somewhere around the third grade.
“You fucking tried to stab me, you psycho bitch!”
“I can’t help it if you insist on standing behind me while I’m cutting bread. Trying to sneak a look down my top again, huh? Pervert.”
“Nah, last time I checked there was just a clear view to your feet.”
“Oh, and you’re so well endowed in that area.”
Kristin sighed and walked in to stop the argument before it escalated. Idina immediately pointed at Michelle.
“She just tried to stab me.”
Michelle raised an eyebrow.
“And why are you telling her? What’s she going to do about it?”
Idina ignored her and thrust her hand towards Kristin.
“Look, she drew blood and everything.”
Kristin took Idina’s hand and inspected it.
“I can’t see anything, honey.”
“Look!” Idina insisted, pointing at her thumb.
Kristin squinted. There did appear to be a miniscule cut. She looked up at Idina and stuck her bottom lip out in an exaggerated pout.
“Awwww, my poor baby, did you get a boo-boo?”
“If you offer to kiss it better for her, I swear to God I’ll use this knife to slit my wrists.”
Idina raised both eyebrows at Kristin.
“Well? What are you waiting for? That’s the best offer I’ve heard all year!”
L is for loner
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
I have this reputation as a quiet, shy person who doesn’t like the company of others. That’s not true. I’m just very picky about who I spend my time with.
I know people think that Kristin’s good for me. That she brings me out of my shell. Well, kinda. I just want to be wherever she is. If that means at a party with a hundred people, fine. If it means just the two of us in her dressing room, all the better.
Kristin is a people person, she loves noise and bustle. I’m a Kristin person, I love her.
M is for marvel
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
Idina finds her standing in front of the couch, looking at it like it’s the eighth wonder of the world.
“What’s up?”
Kristin turns in a stupor and points.
“That’s our couch.”
Idina nods slowly.
“No, but Idina, that’s our couch.”
Idina smiles in realisation. She puts her arm around Kristin’s shoulders.
“I know, baby.”
“Our couch. Not mine, or yours, ours.”
Idina laughs, pressing her nose into Kristin’s hair.
“OK, maybe you should stay out of the kitchen for a while. I’m kinda scared that seeing our dishwasher and our toaster and our stove might just blow your mind.”
N is for narcotic
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
She’s never been a good sleeper. Especially when sharing a bed. She always worried that she’d snore or drool. Or that he’d be able to feel the beginnings of stubble on legs that were a day overdue for shaving. Or that he’d wake up and regret that she was there.
Lately she hasn’t found sleep to be a problem. She wakes up with a delightfully warm weight on her chest, feeling rested and content. The deep sleep might be a result of the fact that the warm weight completely tired her out the night before. Beats counting sheep any day.
O is for opposite
Rating: R
Word count: 100
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.
When she’s kissing Taye, she can’t help but think of all the times she’s kissed his wife. She wonders if he can taste Idina on her.
As she slides her hands up Idina’s thighs and lowers her head she tries desperately not to think of Idina sinking to her knees in front of Taye, taking him into her mouth.
When Idina’s breath hitches, in that dreadful second, Kristin waits for the whispered name to cross her lips.
“Kristin.”
She stifles a sob, relieved. But she knows that this fucked-up triangle can’t last.
P is for paltry
Rating: R
Word count: 200
I thought I’d cracked their little code. Weeks of careful study, and a degree of covert stalking, has resulted in some concrete conclusions.
“You wanna run lines?” is code for making out. Because Idina always comes out with her lipstick smudged after ‘running lines’.
“You wanna block that scene?” is code for something more energetic. There’s a lot of banging and grunting going on during ‘blocking’.
“You wanna grab a bite after work?” means that Taye is away somewhere. Kristin always perks up considerably when going for a ‘bite after work’ with Idina.
I had thought that “You wanna come in for a cupcake?” was code for…well, eating of sorts was definitely involved. Then Kristin extended that very same invitation to me last week.
I got all excited, practically ran into her dressing room and was very disappointed to see a plateful of cupcakes.
So I can verify that “You wanna come in for a cupcake?” means…exactly that. I got a measly cupcake and I had to revisit my theory.
Maybe I’m reading a little too much into “You wanna get a coffee? My treat.” Hmmm, I might need to invite one of them for a coffee, just to check.
Q is for quilt
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
Idina thinks this must be her favourite place in the world. A New York winter shivers outside the window. She’s lying on the couch not watching the movie that’s playing. She’s sharing a warm quilt with a short blonde. In this moment life seems perfect.
But it’s not her couch. It’s not her quilt. It’s not her life. In a short while she’ll have to go back to her own apartment where she’ll crawl into bed with her husband. He’ll roll over and pull her to him, winding his strong arm around her waist. But it won’t feel like this.
R is for rind
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 150
She absentmindedly plays with the skin of the lime from her drink. Normally she stays away from spirits. Tonight vodka is her friend.
Vodka and soda with a slice of lime, not lemon. Idina’s drink. She smiles sardonically. The reason she is drinking at all is to forget about Idina. It isn’t quite working out that way.
She thinks back to the last time she saw her. The party after her last show. Idina had propped up the bar all night, watching her. Seemed like she drank herself sober. Kristin had danced and laughed and sparkled the whole night. But it was an act the green eyes following her every move could see right through.
At the end of the night, Idina had walked steadily to Kristin, kissed her on the cheek and left.
Now Kristin finds herself in drinking in LA. With nothing but Idina’s favourite drink for company.
S is for startle
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
I think I scared the life out of her the first time I kissed her. She was sitting in my dressing-room, fresh from the shower, complaining that Michelle had run over her foot in the wheelchair. There was a moment; her bottom lip was sticking out slightly, a series of lines crinkling the space between her dark eyebrows, and I couldn’t not kiss her. So I did. And she physically jumped off her seat. She looked at me with widened eyes before turning and walking out. But she soon came back. And the next time we kissed, she started it.
T is for trickle
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
She stares at the needle in her arm, feeling the drug spread slowly and delightfully through her body. She thinks she might be in love with her drip. She thinks she might be a little bit high.
She wonders how much of the stuff in her head is real. Is she really green? Did she really melt? Can she really fly?
She remembers falling, not flying. She doesn’t remember landing, only hurting. She couldn’t breathe. She thinks she asked for Kristin. Kristin wasn’t there.
Taye’s here, worried and strong, keeping watch.
Kristin should be here, flying with her. So high.
U is for undulating
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
The sky is unnervingly blue. Kristin sits on the sand and watches the waves roll onto the golden sand. It is warm and sunny in California, as always.
Kristin can’t help but think back to a winter’s day in New York. To two people huddled together on a bench in Battery Park under a sky heavy with threatened snow. Two sets of hands clasping a single cup of hot-chocolate. And later watching the snow fall, snuggled under a blanket in a warm apartment.
Kristin shivers from the metaphorical chill of her current surroundings. It is clinical perfection. It isn’t real.
V is for votive
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
When I was younger, I used to ask Him to take away the feelings I had that I knew were wrong. I hated them. I hated myself for having them. I thought He must be punishing me by forcing me to feel that way. I begged and pleaded. I’d be a good girl, I’d do anything, just take away these feelings. But He never did.
Then I met her, and suddenly it all changed. The feelings didn’t feel wrong anymore. They felt wonderful. And I like to think He knew that all along.
Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers.
W is for wanton
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
She knows she shouldn’t do it. But sometimes she needs to show it.
So she’ll sit in Idina’s lap during rehearsals, wrapped up in her arms for the world to see just how much she belongs there.
She’ll make sure that she leaves with Idina. Whether they are only walking to the sidewalk then going their separate ways or not, they will walk out that door together and people will know it.
She keeps Idina to herself more than she should, hidden away, just the two of them.
It’s dangerous. Someone could get hurt. But she needs to show it.
X is for Xmas
Rating: G
Word count: 100
They were seated in a tiny café in the Village. The windows were covered in condensation. Idina used her finger to write ‘Happy Xmas’ on a single pane. Kristin smiled.
“My momma always yelled at me if I wrote ‘Xmas’, she said it was ‘taking the Christ out of Christmas’.”
Idina tilted her head.
“As a kid I used to worry something would happen to me if I wrote ‘Christmas’. So I always wrote Xmas.”
She took Kristin’s hand.
“But now I do a lot of things that the Rabbi would frown upon. I write Xmas now cuz it’s shorter.”
Y is for yank
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 250
“I don’t get it.”
Kristin’s confused voice renewed the laughter among the other women at the reunion. Michelle had been telling a story which had something to do with Norbert and sex, as Michelle’s stories tended to be. The ending had caused much raucous laughter, but Kristin was lost. Idina put an arm around her shoulders and squeezed.
“It’s OK baby. You guys, she’s from the South, they’re a bit slow down there.”
Kristin pursed her lips and reached for her phone. She punched in a few numbers.
“What’re you doing? Calling Denny to have him explain it to you?” Idina asked, still giggling.
“No, I’m calling my momma to tell her what you just said.”
Idina’s smile froze.
“What? No, look, I’m sorry, I was kidding.”
“Oooooh, Big Bad Menzel is scared of Kristin’s mom!” Michelle noted, gleefully.
“No I’m not. She’s lovely. And she’s been incredibly accepting of the fact that I’m a Jewish divorcee who has corrupted her daughter…but I don’t think she’s ever gotten over me not being Southern.”
“Hey momma, it’s me. I’m fine. Yeah, she’s fine too, but you’ll never guess what she just said…well, I think I should let her tell you. I’ll put her on.”
Kristin handed the phone over with a smile. Idina took it like it might suddenly explode.
“Hello?”
“…the time at the third stroke will be ten…”
“You bitch!” Idina exclaimed, shoving Kristin’s shoulder.
“That’ll teach you to be polite. Damn Yank.”
Idina kissed her lightly.
“Yes ma’am.”
Z is for zipper
Rating: PG
Word count: 150
We met in a dressing room. She barged in, hair plastered to her head, make-up half removed, wearing an oversized child’s dress. I thought she was beautiful.
Anthony introduced us. She was obviously embarrassed by her appearance, she’d come in to get Anthony’s help with her zipper, it was stuck. We made the appropriate noises about each other’s work as he tried to work the zipper free. He did, eventually, and she left.
Later that night, she walked into the bar looking like a million dollars. She came straight up to me and held out her hand.
“Hi, I believe you met my evil twin earlier. She’s gone now. I’m Kristin.”
The moment our hands touched I knew I wanted her. By the end of the night, I knew I needed her. Didn’t take all that much longer to figure out that I loved her.
Now? Now I’ve got her.